It’s cold today.
For those of you just joining us, this blog is brought to you from the frozen heart of the
So, as I was saying: it’s cold. When I left for work this morning, it was -5 degrees outside. Yes, that’s five degrees below zero. Or, to put it another way, thirty-seven degrees below the point at which water freezes.
When it gets this cold, the candle flames freeze, and you have to break them off and warm them up in your hands before they begin to burn.
When it gets this cold, the frost that collects on your windshield overnight mutates. It becomes atomically inseparable from the glass, and laughs derisively at any attempts to remove it via ice scraper, ice pick or flame thrower. The only way to remove this mutant frost is to turn your defrost on ‘high’ and wait for your engine to reach normal operating temperature, which at this ambient temperature takes roughly twenty minutes. Of course, the drive to work takes about eighteen minutes. This means that you will be unable to see out of any of your car windows until it is no longer necessary to do so.
Needless to say, when I stepped outside to start my car this morning, I shook my fists at the sky and cursed the cold, bitter, unforgiving darkness. Then I whimpered and came back inside to stick my hands into the refrigerator to warm them up. I had to be careful because my ears had frozen, and if I had tapped them, they would have broken off like crackers.
So those of you complaining about having to put on a sweater because it dipped below 50? I hate you. Nothing personal – I just hope you end up being allergic to that wool sweater and itch a lot.
February 1st, 2008 at 1:43 pm
Oh hey, it’s 24C here now or.. *checks* 75F. Tees and shorts and flip flops kind of weather. Don’t even have a chance to feel allergic to a wool sweater because, you know, I don’t get to wear one.
Just thought I’ll share.
February 1st, 2008 at 2:05 pm
May you step on a pop-top and blow out your flip flop.
February 1st, 2008 at 2:39 pm
-5? I thought that was a balmy day for you guys up there! Of course, we hit +34 today here. (Thought you should know.)
February 1st, 2008 at 2:51 pm
Nah, you’re thinking of Prudhoe Bay. They were at -55 a few days ago.
34 degrees? Above zero? Break out the Hawaiian shirts!
February 1st, 2008 at 9:37 pm
hope my picts of the gulf helped!
we had a lovely day and tomorrow should be warmer!
February 2nd, 2008 at 4:53 pm
Well, it warmed up here, too. We’re expecting a high of 5 today.
February 3rd, 2008 at 12:15 pm
I have a garage. Is weather still a problem in some parts of the world?
February 3rd, 2008 at 7:02 pm
So… I just got back from Florida yesterday…
February 4th, 2008 at 12:23 am
Here in Singapore it’s a balmy 80-90° F (with about 95% humidity), pretty much year-round. Sweaters and jackets are reserved for indoor use.
February 4th, 2008 at 8:29 am
Pinhole: Ah, a garage. I have heard of these modern conveniences. I fear that if I had one, it would be filled with robot parts and beer. Priorities, you know.
February 4th, 2008 at 8:30 am
wordvixen: Balmy? Sunny? Hurricane-y? I mean, welcome back!
February 4th, 2008 at 8:31 am
Heidi: you and Lis can get together sometime and laugh at me freezing my various parts off. I take comfort in the fact that sweaters are a great fashion accessory.
February 4th, 2008 at 2:39 pm
It was about 50-60 degrees F the first few days, but shot up to 70-82 degrees the last few days. Since it was about 30 degrees here, it was still a nice change even on the cooler days. Plus, I just love palm trees. I even have a favorite one! I took a picture of it.