I haven’t written anything in my novel for about three weeks now, and I feel horrible about it. It was going so well when I stopped. I had just finished writing a key scene and was extremely pleased with myself. I even remarked to my wife, “I think I can see the end of this thing.” But then I stopped, and I haven’t opened it again. It’s been sitting on the figurative shelf (actually on my USB flash drive), untouched, waiting for me to get my shit together and finally finish the damn thing.
It’s still going well - don’t get me wrong. I’m at least 2/3 finished, I think, and I can finish it without too many problems. But there are times when it flows, and times when it doesn’t, and right now seems to be one of the times when it doesn’t.
I’m still writing, though. Let’s have no misconceptions on that score. I wrote a short ebook the other day about making your own pet food and put it up for sale on a few sites, and to my surprise, I’ve sold a copy already. I’m blogging, too. In fact, it’s probably a good way of seeing how the novel’s coming along - no blog entries: busy writing novel. Lots of blog entries: novel not going so well. I just wish I could figure out why it is that whenever I go a spell of time without working on my novel it feels like I’ve been horribly negligent and deserve to be taken out and beaten.
I’m not slacking off, I swear. I want to finish it as soon as possible, if for no other reason than I want to read it and see if it’s as well written as I’ve imagined it. Does that make sense? But I can’t write if it’s not flowing, so I sit and beat myself up instead. Productive, eh?
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